Listen to your elders. Listen to your associates. Listen to yourself. It isn't the same as it was back in the old days. During the days of the old guard, the lifestyle was a well guarded secret that required individuals to go to great lengths to become involved and even then it wasn't assured that somebody would be invited to the secret.
Nowadays, the secret is out for anybody who wants to google it. The titles are used, the terms thrown with little regard and boys are claiming to be men or Masters without having earned the distinction. The lifestyle has become diluted with those who only want the reward but don't want to do any of the work.
People wonder what happened to the community where they used to be almost worshipped and revered by those who wanted to learn and experience the mystery at their hands, and whips. Now they feel disregarded and forgotten, or worse, disrespected and disdained.
Contrary to popular belief, this slide in respect, discipline, and tradition isn't the fault of an influx of new interest from different sexualities, nor was it the ability to gleam those once precious gems of knowledge that are now readily available via google, but it is the lack of an enforceable standard and the ability to hold those involved to that standard that has allowed the lifestyle to degrade from the disciplined and rigid structure of the old guard to the now loose and informal TNG.
There is a desire for a formal D/s group that harkens back to the discipline and most of the values of the Old Guard, but the days of the Old Guard have past, something original must be founded.
This is where The Cloak and Collar Society comes into play.
One of the first things about the CCS is that it is not a gender or sexuality specific organization. This means that it will not cater to any one gender being in any one role nor will it seek to pigeonhole any of it's members into any one gender.
The CCS supports LGBT rights.
The other major foundation of the CCS is that it is strictly a D/s lifestyle group. Topping and bottoming are the physical and bedroom oriented activities associated with BDSM and Masters and slaves are the more extreme forms of power exchange, the CCS is more concerned with the middle ground.
The stress we place on a standard set of expectations regarding D/s dynamics is important. If everybody is on the same page then confusion about what is and what is not appropriate behavior is all but eliminated.
By having a formal D/s group with an established standard of behavior that everybody involved in that group agrees to, adheres too, and enforces then those who habitually cross the line are weeded out and exposed which then can lead to punishment if they are members or ostracization of they are not members.
This is what was in place with the old guard. Interested parties had to prove themselves to get in and then they paid for the privilege.
I'm not suggesting anything so extreme, but I am making the suggestion that we make uniting together worth it so that instead of a large group of individuals all playing at similar games together with no referees, we get everybody that wants to play the game to learn the same set of rules so we can avoid the fouls.
One thing should be clear on this; this isn't about personal dynamic between couples or poly dynamics, but in a group setting, the social setting. The teachings provided for dominants and submissives will not be enforced on a personal relationship level, but those same standards can bleed their way into those dynamics.
To recap, the purpose of a Formal D/s group is to establish a standard of behavior, a code of conduct, and a bonding point for those that agree to that standard and join the group. Non members aren't held to the same code, but the submissives of the group will see a difference. They'd know what to expect from the members of the group because of the expectations agreed to and placed upon the members and the consequences of not meeting those expectations (mostly the ones that say don't be an asshole, jerk, douchebag, etc.)
Do you agree? Do you believe that the D/s lifestyle can be sustained independently from any social institution that supports it and the unique relationships found within D/s? What are your thoughts on Formal D/s Groups?
